Shaunti Feldhahn, best-selling author, social researcher, and nationally syndicated columnist, spoke for two convocations at Southern on November 29 and focused on the misconceptions people have about members of the opposite sex. She asked students if they were willing to give God permission to change their minds about relationships, then offered a special prayer for the opening of their hearts before beginning the talks.
Lauren Brooks, senior public relations major, was already familiar with Feldhahn’s viewpoints, but still found value in the meetings’ message.
“Even though I’ve read her books, it was still a good reminder of how opposite each gender is—how they communicate and function,” Lauren said.
Feldhahn started her talk by addressing the women.
“We think men are confident and cocky, but it’s really just a surface emotion to mask their fear of being unsuccessful,” Feldhahn said. “The truth is, women worry about being loved, but men worry whether they’re adequate at what they do.”
She mentioned that the Bible repeatedly urges women to submit and respect their husbands. She believes that this is because God had already created women to naturally love, but respect and submission were traits that needed to be learned.
After encouraging the female students to build up their men, she turned her attention to the guys.
“There is no permanent ‘I feel loved’ switch after you marry her,” Feldhahn said. “The question then becomes ‘would he choose me all over again?’ That needs to be answered everyday.”
Feldhahn also shared the results of a survey question she researched: “What do you wish your spouse knew the most?” The most common response from women was, “I wish my husband knew how much he is my hero.” The most common response from the men was, “I wish my wife knew how much I love her.”
After the convocations ended, Feldhahn took time to autograph books and speak with the students individually.
“I think it was good for Southern students to hear this message because it was a great way to start a discussion between those who may not be familiar with these differences,” Lauren said. “It's never a bad thing to learn more about each other in order to better friendships, relationships, and communication.”
The views and opinions of campus guests do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Southern Adventist University. An individual's or group's invitation to speak or present on campus should not be regarded as a university endorsement of their philosophies and beliefs.